The Benevolent Ricktator is the beloved hereditary ruler for life of the small but powerful Balkan state of Trashcanistan.  Tourism is no longer a source of income for Trashcanistan because Google Maps kicked Trashcanistan off their listings for being grossly politically incorrect, so no one can find it anymore!  Now the main source of Trashcanistan’s income is from  Benevolent Ricktator craft beers and seltzers.

The beer’s slogan is “You will buy this beer of else!”  The “or else what” is that the citizens of Trashcanistan don’t eat!  The Benevolent Ricktator allows all manor of free speech and protests after dissidents have been vetted by his firing squad, and he releases all political prisoners every February 30th!  The penalty for disparaging Ricktator beer has been reduced to only five years in the electric chair.  

The U.S. president has air force one…the Ricktator has air farce one.  The president has the secret service…the Ricktator has the blabbermouth service:  they can keep a secret…it’s just the people they tell it to who have a problem.  Budweiser has the Clydesdale horses and Trashcanistan has a navy consisting of  the aptly named Ricktatorship,  which will be in Boston Summers and Fort Lauderdale winters when not on its world domination tour.  

The Ricktator urges everyone to drink responsibly…Don’t spill any ---that would be alcohol abuse.  The Ricktator reminds you that one drink is just right, two is too many, three is not enough, and that’s why the beer is made in four-packs!  Ricktator beer comes with free political asylum in Trashcanistan, where there are no extradition treaties and bribes are now accepted in Bitcoin.  If you are lucky enough to get a can autographed by the Rickator, he guarantees that it will be worth at least a nickel.

Remember that a balanced diet is a beer in each hand and that beer is the breakfast of former champions.  The Ricktator will neither confirm or deny the stories that he was abduced by aliens, so you will have to come to your own conclusion in that regard.  ​